***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
