IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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