You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Randomize