Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
