i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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