I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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