so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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