It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
