Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
My butt remains clenched, sir.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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