i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
