She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
