I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
