There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
