to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
You made out with two different species that night
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
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