My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Randomize
