I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Randomize
