Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
