her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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