She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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