I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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