D3 body, D1 cock
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
