Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?

(440): View more from Ohio

What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose

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(303): View more from Colorado

I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk

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(519): View more from Ontario

dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes

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(505): View more from New Mexico

i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.

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(540): View more from Virginia

hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.

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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

I see more hoeing in ur future

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