Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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