Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
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