'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
then he tried to convert me to islam
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize