I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
