i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
