why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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