my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Randomize
