We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
