Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
