i just google imaged poop.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize