I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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