hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
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