I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
