i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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