You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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