Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
they're like a gay fantastic four
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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