i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
