your room smells of hookers.
And success
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
This baby is an asshole
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
