NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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