Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize