I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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