just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Randomize