11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Randomize
