seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
