I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize