Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
i love accidental penises.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
