Bisexual people are plain selfish.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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