i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
There's even glitter on my cock...
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