would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
